Tuesday, October 28, 2008

Really Struck my Chord!

This past Sunday at church I was hit right between the eyes with a message I needed. My husband and I rarely have an argument but we did have a rather heated discussion this week and Sunday's message went right along with it.

We are to Celebrate the differences in our marriage. There was an analogy used that Men are like waffles and Women are like spaghetti. Waffles are rigid and fit into a single box (issue) at a time. Whether the box is fixed or not, waffles can move on to the next box. Spaghetti, on the other hand, isn't rigid and it intertwines with other noodles. The analogy illustrates that men are able to move on if they can't fix a problem but for women everything is related to everything else in some way. Of course these are generalizations and not standard for every person, but God hardwired men and women differently for a reason.

Gender Differences + Personality Differences +Life = Conflict
Marital Conflict Myths
1. Good Marriages don't have Struggles
2. Conflict hurts a good Marriage
*Allow God to use differences to settle conflict in a healthy way.
*When you deal with conflict properly, it can create a greater sense of intimacy.
*Perspective on Communication differs
-Men converse to address a situation
-Women converse to connect with others
Communication Blockers
Communication is more than just the words you are saying. Some stats break communication down like this:
7% Words
35% Tones
58% Non verbal cues
Here are some things that count as Communication Blockers:
*Rolling Eyes
*Sighing Deeply
*Not stopping what your doing to listen
*No eye contact
*Using the time someone else is talking to think about what you are going to say (I am so guilty with this one)
*Stopping Listening
*Becoming Defensive or Angry
*Interrupting Partner
Ephesians 4 has something to say about communication
"Therefore each of you must put off falsehood and speak truthfully to his neighbor, for we are all members of one body." (V. 25)
*We are to be honest and speak the truth in love.
"In your anger do not sin; Do not let the sun go down while you are still angry, and do not give the devil a foothold." (V. 26-27)
*Anger is not a sin but a human emotion. It is what you do with it that determines if it is a sin. *Anger has the ability to be positive if you use it as motivation to do good.
"Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen." (V. 29)
*Just because you feel badly and apologize does not undo the damage done by words.
*As a Christian you should expect growth in tongue control.
"Get rid of all bitterness, rage and anger, brawling and slander, along with every form of malice. Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as Christ God forgave you." (V. 31-32)
Key Points
1. Make it your goal to Resolve conflict not to "win" an argument.
2. Choose your words carefully.
3. Don't bring up the past. (This here is the problem I have. I have a database in my head that hangs on to everything said or done. This is not healthy)
4. Don't be a Mind-Reader.
*Don't assume their motivation behind words or actions.
5. Be quick to forgive. (This is another one I have an issue with)
I know we are all a work in progress but we should all be striving to grow and learn to better handle conflict especially in the context of marriage. I thank Pastor Dave for this sermon, it is really something I need to work on because I am totally a Professional Mind-Reader (or I like to think I know what the other person is really thinking). I love my family and want to set healthy examples for children to follow! Have a wonderful Day!

Sunday, October 26, 2008

Home Schooling!

My husband and I are in the midst of deciding if and when to go about Home Schooling our oldest daughter. We want what is best for our family. We have found such great support from all of those we have talked with this about! Thank you to everyone who has given us prayers, feedback and advice! We would like to teach our children in a christian based curriculum. Our school district here is lacking and we do not feel that our daughter is meeting her full potential! I have come across a list of Pros and Cons!

The pros:
Educational Freedom
Physical Freedom
Emotional Freedom
Religious Freedom
Closer Family Relationships
Stability During Difficult Times
Well-Rested Kids
No Busywork

The Cons:
Time Restraints
Financial Restraints
Being with Your Kids 24/7 (I don't really see this as a con if you have a supportive/helpful husband/partner/support system)
Limited Team Sports
Living Outside the Norm

Looking over this list of Pros and Cons, the Cons aren't all that bad. We are already a one income family, I have a wonderfully supportive husband, I love being with my kids. This is the choice we are leaning closer to at this point. Thank you again to all who have invested time in us!

Tuesday, October 21, 2008

For Bread Machine Lovers!

I have come across a website for different Breads made in your bread machine. I have fallen in love with my bread machine and am looking forward to trying new recipes. Especially the Pumpkin nut, cream of wheat and cinnamon breads. If you have any that you would like to share I would love to try them out! Yummy!

Monday, October 20, 2008

All I want for Halloween is My Two Front Teeth!

Our oldest has finally lost both of her top front teeth. This was a battle! She already has one big tooth coming in. She still looks so cute and loves being toothless. I thought she might be a little self conscience about it but she is in love with her new look. She is too funny!

Where has the last 20 months gone?

Seriously, Where has the time gone? Twenty months has flown by! A lot of it a blur of sleepless nights and hourly feedings, but mostly wonderful happy moments. Our twins have become very independent, exploratative little people. They are no longer our "little babies"! We are currently in the process of weaning, yes I am still nursing our twins. We are having little emotional outburst because they think they can nurse at any given moment! We are trying to limit it to nap time and bedtime....Their vocabulary is booming. They have both begun to put sentences together! Our little man says, "Can I have a bite? Where'd it go? What's that? Apple, Airplane, Outside" and many more. Our little lady isn't as vocal as her big brother! She does say "Mommy stuck, please, What's that?" and a few more. They are a blast and I am so very thankful for them every day! Here's to the next stages!

Wednesday, October 15, 2008

My daughter lost the first of her top teeth and so I took the opportunity to take a picture of her. I can't believe how different it makes her look! She still looks beautiful but she is looking so much older and I am not ready for her to get any older. She is such a beautiful, kind, smart and very helpful little girl...I am so proud to be her mother and really to feel blessed!
On another note, I was finally able to catch some catch light in her eyes! It is something that has been frustrating me for awhile. I really am happy with the way this photo turned out!

Sunday, October 12, 2008

My handsome Hubs!

Look how handsome my husband is! Just had to share!

Cider Anyone!

This time of year brings with it wonderful taste and smells. One of which is my all time favorite, Apples. I love Apple pie, crisp, muffins and well all things Apples. I wanted so badly to find a place where we could make our own cider, and we found it. We had a blast squeezing our own apple cider. We made three gallons which needed 6 bags of apples.That took 3 buckets once washed.

Our daughter loved loading the apple press while Dad and I took turns spinning it. She tried but it took everything she had! It was pretty hard! What fun though and the result was so yummy once we got home and warmed up with a yummy cup o' cider!

Friday, October 10, 2008

One (I stress One) of my Phobias!

One of my fears is of insects. Don't ask me why I am so threatened by something that is 1/10000 of my size. We have been having these little guys running around the house. My husband has informed me that his research indicated not to fear these spiders. This is because it is highly unlikely that they would bite humans but if they do they have bites equivalent to a yellow jacket sting. From what I recall being stung hurts like the dickens! This actually just adds to my severe hatred and fear of this minuscule creature. Here is the information on the Callobius Severus.

Thursday, October 9, 2008

My Youngest did not want to co-operate with me, my oldest was a Poser!

Check out the face of my little one! She was not happy with the fact that I put her back in the stroller. I only let one of them out at a time today since there were quite a few kids already running around. That way I could keep a close eye on the one running around! I am not sure if that was the best idea but it sounded good at the time! I did get a couple of shots that I like today.

I am not sure which one of these photos I prefer. I do like the straight out of the camera shot but I like the softness in the second one!
This is my favorite for the day! I love that she is so willing to pose and play...I only hope my little ones start to enjoy it as well!

Wednesday, October 8, 2008

Pumpkin Patch

We had a great time this last weekend going to the Pumpkin Patch! Even the babes had a great time picking out the most perfect pumpkins! We enjoyed pumpkin bowling! Hot Chocolate or Apple Cider and a Carmel Apple. We had a blast trying to make our way through the hay maze. I think the kids did a better job of finding their way and not getting stressed about getting stuck. Best of all we got to get some much missed Pumpkin Butter! It is so good on pancakes. I am also looking forward to making my first ever Pumpkin puree. Dan made a Pumpkin Pie last year but I actually preferred the can stuff. Sorry babe, I love you! This year I have come across a recipe/technique that sounds pretty exciting to me! I hope everyone is enjoying the fall season and all the wonderful smells and taste that come along with it.

Saturday, October 4, 2008

My answer to Take out Breakfast!

I have what I think is one, if not the best recipe for a breakfast muffin! It encompasses sausage, cheese and carbs. This has become a family favorite and has been passed down through a couple of generations. Here it is:
Sausage Cheese Biscuits
1 package Jimmy Dean Spicy Sausage (if you can't handle it, you can go milder)
2cups all purpose flour
2Tbsp Sugar
1/2 cup cheddar cheese
1Tbsp Baking Powder
1/4tsp salt
1cup milk
1 egg slightly beaten
1 stick of margarine melted

Mix together the flour, sugar, baking powder, salt, milk, egg and margarine.
Fry sausage and add to mixture with the cheese.
Spray muffin pan
Fill 2/3 full
Bake @ 375 for 20 minutes
Remove from pan as soon as you get them out of the oven.

Enjoy slightly warm or make the night before for breakfast and warm in the microwave. So good with either a glass of milk or a cup of coffee.
Thank you to Mrs. U for the above picture!

Friday, October 3, 2008

How should allowance be handled?

Our daughter is now at an age where she is able to understand (if only a little) that money does not grow on trees. We have gone back and forth on how much, when and what for she should get an allowance. Her responsibility is minimal and we have been paying her $1.00 a week for the things she has been doing. She is to make her bed, clean her room, put her clothes in the dirty clothes hamper, help set and clear the table. I have talked to friends and read in a number of articles that these things are expected of her age and not appropriate to pay for. How then do we teach money management? Will this lead to unrealistic expectations into adulthood? I found great tips on Children and Chores. I have yet to find what should be paid for! Any suggestions, thoughts, or resources?

Thursday, October 2, 2008

I didn't know I didn't have a stance!

I am a pretty simple girl. The things that don't affect me usually don't bother me. When I see something horrible I am sad, uplifting or great I am happy. I am having a hard time delving into my newest class towards my associates degree! Ethics! Who knew there was so much to learn about right and wrong and the evolving arguments for and against those issues. So I am supposed to write a 700-2000 word essay on Reproductive Technologies. This encompasses cloning, stem cell research, genetic screening and a few others. How can I not have a stance for or against. I personally agree with certain parts of the theory while others strike me as something we should be cautious about. Take stem cell research, the theory behind sounds like a great solution to many diseases. As a christian and a believer that there is a being at conception (this is a whole other debate in itself), I can not say that I agree with the process with which they harvest these stem cells...any who I am having a hard time formulating any kind of idea as to which side to write my essay on! Just thought I would vent a little about the new joys of having to use my brain for things more than the day to day. I think it because I have not ever encountered a reason to take a stance on an issue such as this.
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